Monday, October 15, 2012

The Call of Adoption

I just wanted to share these beautiful quotes on the call of adoption...and even the answer to helping orphans. Most adoptive parents can agree that even though we have one child no longer orphaned, in our hearts we know we are leaving many more behind;(

I went to Russia not knowing what to expect...maybe expecting a little girl that looked like me..and who really was my daughter born a far. As I walked into a poorly lit room I sat and shook with nerves and fear; of such a moment, that was finally here. It was too quickly that this child appeared before me, and I had forgotten how to breathe...She was so awkward, and I was so awkward. We both locked eyes and did not know what to do next. She was pale and chunky, barely fitting in her blue dress. Her wheezing in between her cries made me think-this can't be her? She doesn't look like me at all! It was when my husband took her from me, that I was able to really look at the daughter God gave me...through God's eyes I knew then that I was so blessed! His plan was better than my plan. His eyes saw clearer than my eyes...She had a beauty that was rare for Russia...her BM was a foreigner and too young to take on life in Moscow, let alone a little girl. Though I believe she had a hope for her baby and that is why she left her in the hospital that day...after prior days of contemplation of what to do for this special child.

When I left Russia with a daughter. I left with such pride and I have pride for Russia in my heart because of the opportunity they give to foreigners to adopt. Apart of my memories in Russia; when I look back, are the other parents at the embassy, who had adopted 2 and 3 and 4 and even 5 times or more, from Russia. I felt such awe for those people and their hearts and resources of course, for international adoption. We struggled to scrape for just little girl that I wanted so badly for my be mine and for me to be hers. We were overwhelmed by the Lord and the faith of flying across the world for such an unknown child. No picture, no name. God made us feel so special...and its a kind of special that doesn't go away! Every day, we are graced with His children...all with their own story of how they came to us...all through the same Father. God has a plan for all of them. Now, there is a familiar calling in the air this season...and after Nicaragua much of our lives have changed. We now know there is much to do...and so much need around us-world wide. The children are our future; and this country needs a special generation ahead...Jesus cares deeply for His orphans and He wants us to as well. And through Hope, I began thinking about her life as she gets older...her possible challenges or upsets. She's the only girl, she will ask us questions because people stop us all the time and are confused when they see her. I wonder sometimes, when I should stop talking in front of her about being adopted. It can even get South Florida its a diverse group, but not for Asians. So everyone assumes she  is from China, sometimes it's cute to hear and sometimes its not depending on my day...not all Asians are from China! But anyhow, there is no point in explaining because even when I say she's from Moscow, or her family is from Kyrgyzstan...I just say Kazakh, and even with that country I get a deer in the headlights look! Sighhhh...anyway, Hope is the only girl, she has her own room. She always wants to room in with the boys...and she is quite girly despite all the boys...but I believe every girl does need a sister in this world..and I was ever  so blessed in having one. In all the seasons of life, I needed my sister. She is the only one that has truly been a friend to me. There isn't a friendship that can compare-who can agree with you more than your sister;) Yes, we have the room in our house, yes we most definitely have the love...and my daughter Hope is such a loving and compassionate and helpful girl. The Lord blessed me with a daughter. She has even changed my husband in ways that I cannot explain! God's mercy on us is so great..and yes, at times it is through the babes that He is talking. So...why did I write all of this? I don't even was only supposed to be some quotes hehe...I guess I got carried away with my heart speaking again. Stepping out in faith for China is scary for us. I can't even explain shouldn't be but it is. I guess because Hope is so perfect how can another compare? But in my heart I know it can only be more mercy from the Lord as well as love and miracles...for the world to see....especially in our own family. We didn't have all harmony in the decision to adopt Hope. It was hard to defend a little girl who wasn't even here yet, but the odds seemed already against her. And so it starts with Mei Mei; you are not even here yet, but the odds have been against you. The enemy prefers for us not to walk in faith and leave these children oppressed. Let it all just is hard and it is what it is (I dislike this expression a lot). But, if we are just passing by like a mist in this life...and our children are just loaned to us by our Heavenly Father, then why wouldn't we take leaps? Why wouldn't we raise our hands for these children and care for them? So...I think I will leave you with these quotes that I have never read or seen before.

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