Prayers

These last couple of months have taught me so much; when it comes to God.
I have learned how important God's timing is, and how important it is to never stop talking to him. I also have learned, about the strength of prayer...and how much stronger it is when we are all united & together praying.

I want to write down some people's names on my blog, so that maybe you can help too. Help us reach God together and pray for some adoptive parents.

'Andrew' (you just received your boy from Kazak..I pray for a safe return, and a brand new beginning for your family..God Bless).

'Angie' (I pray that your daugher gets ready to come home, and that you will be hopping on a plane real soon to meet her, finally!)

'Anna' (You have been of great help to me, and I thank you for that. I thank God for introducing us, I pray you receive your child whoever he/she may be).

'Lynn' (I feel like I may have met a forever friend, and I pray you reach your children as safely as possible and that God leads you the whole way through, so that your journey may be peaceful as well as wonderful..no more disapointments here!)

'Adrienne' (I pray that you will be Blessed with as many children as God desires for you & your family!).

'Dennis' (I have fallen in love with you & your family; and I wanna pray for them & pray for you..forever).

'Our children' (God please let us do your will to Glorify you Lord; please protect these motherless babies, and guide us so that we can complete your plan).


In Jesus' Precious Name...AMEN.

Another denied grant letter....

GROAAAAAAAANING!!!!

I saw that an envelope in the mailbox today, was from one of the grants we applied to..my hopes wern't too high, besides it still wasn't what I really want (USCIS I- 171)!
I opened it up because, atleast it was something adoption related..but it was a single letter stating that there is just not enough funds to go around.
I understand that; our adoption is in God's hands, and God alone will provide.

Sometimes it is so hard to not think about our adoption though..I hate the suspense, the uncertainty. You'd think I would be occupied enough; today while cleaning all I can sense aside from the Clorox, was my mind racing with thoughts about everything! The baby's room (its so ugly now), the furniture, the disorganization in my home, when my daughter starts school, her name (if we are certain about it being Hope), uhmm what else..oh yes, 'the what ifs' don't you love them? What if we don't end up getting a daughter...how dumb am I going to feel with an empty pink room? WHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Now for the positives:

1.)We are doing everything that we can possibly can to make this adoption dream a reality!

2.) Today I watched my eldest son receive an award for reading 100 books in single school year..yeahhhh! I am so proud!

3.) My middle child Mackenzie, is so anxious to start Kindergarten.

4.) Noah my youngest son; is a chatterbox, and is building his vocabulary by the minute!
5.) We unoffically adopted my neighbors cats...guess its still God's work?

6.) My mother surprised me last Sunday, by attending church...ahhhhhh what a Blessing from God! Thank you Lord, for answering my prayers!

7.) My neighbor says she wants to give me furniture for our baby girl..sweet!

8.) I am going shopping tomorrow with my sis to buy a dress for our mother's wedding..cool!
9.) I am getting a lot better at speaking/reading Russian!

10.) Freddy & I are spending a lot more time together..oouhhh la la...wink*

Waiting for a SISTER!!!!!!

Noah and I doing our Spongebobe & Patrick move!

Some more of what we do around here...

The wheather here in Florida has been a little wet! When it has been sunny, the boys and I have been trying to make the most!

While we wait!

My Dream

Okay guys I had a dream; of a pink room, and a beautiful baby girl. She is one of the little girls on the photosite..and I don't know why I am in love with her. Maybe she looks alot like my husband, and that is why I am hooked. I am sure; going to Moscow blind, is the best thing for us, because look how silly it is to get attached to a picture..I am already setting myself up!

Anyway..its been very hard for me to decide on a shade of a pink paint for the room (guess I just don't have the experience). In this dream, the room was beautiful and a perfect shade of pink. I just remember in the dream, having a sling and taking this baby everywhere with me. Its going to be hard, I will not be able to ever leave her (I don't leave my boys with anyone but our mother(s)), so imagine what it will be like with our new little addition. Our friends & family are going to get irritated.

I think it is best if we take these next few months, and enjoy eachother. Take time for the boys, and do lots this summer. No matter what it is going to be an adjustment with a fourth child, let alone a baby girl! I have already told my friends, that we are not throwing some big party afterwards..that we are going to need time, and alot of it. For my husband that will not be an issue, he is so very occupied with his boat.

My boys want another dog, and I do too in the future..but I don't think it will be any time soon. Four kids and 2 dogs is going to be a zoo. We have already adopted our neighbors 2 cats, who stay outside! We rescued our english bulldog, and she has been great..but enough for a big family. English bulldogs are wonderful for small children! They are not very active, (so no jumping on the kids, or knocking them down), they are very very affectionate & cuddly, don't like to be walked too long or heat, so must stay indoors, and they are small enough to fit in a crate! SO with that...no other dogs anytime soon. We were given two cockatiels for Easter and someone left the cage door open recently and they flew away! I didn't like cleaning after them, but I still feel bad, and naiively, I am still waiting for them to return?
I figure I have a better chance of receiving the birds back, rather than the I 171 Biometric fingerprint appointment!

Y'know, I stress about this, because I still have other paperwork to take care of. I still have to do the FBI prints and send away for it..but it feels hopeless without the I 171 (permission for Orphan petition).

SIGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Orchestra of feelings..

James 1:27 Religion that God accepts as pure and faultless is this; to look after Orphans & Widows in their distress….



Well I am happy to announce that we are second in line for a Eurasian/Asian girl 24months & under! We will probably be traveling in the fall! YIPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

I feel so anxious; especially during this adoption process, your always thinking okay just one more step to getting closer...but your never close enough!
I thought I would feel so relieved once our Dossier would be sent off..and then I would stop holding my breath keep myself busy with the boys. I have to thank God my boys are great! They keep themselves busy, they only need me for breakfast/luch/supper..oh and laundry too.

Freddy & I started on this adoption journey ever so cautiously. During our wonderful experience with our social worker (homestudy); we began falling in love with this little girl we were going to call Hope. I felt like I couldn't get through the paperwork fast enough. There was always some unique obstacle for us. I was a Canadian and not a U.S. Citizen, or the money wouldn't be there to ever even fathom the idea of an International Adoption..so doubt began giving birth to fear!
Perhaps the idea of us having a little girl, would be just a fantasy and would never happen. Though, when we'd attend Church every service became a stronger message than the next; and more than just the heart's desire, began speaking to me.
I felt painful desires to raise a girl, painful desires for just one child more in our family. The excess of necessity, for parents for unwanted children, started revealing itself to me as well. It is more than just adding to our family now, it is also a duty to help these children who need a family. I find myself asking at times, if it will only be one more? I know I will be at max with 4 kids, but how do I know? How am I going to go to Russia and leave all the rest of the children there? Only God knows what that day will be like, or wether I will have a better understanding of why, things are the way that they are. We can only trust God for those answers and for the reasoning.

Also; Freddy, does not want to paint Hope's room until the very last minute! Grrrrrr. I must know deep down that he is right...but I don't want to feel that our reasons are 'superstitious'. Christians are not supposed to be 'superstitious'! We are not to make too many plans ahead of ourselves, but we are not to believe in 'luck' or 'superstition' either. Acts 4:28 (NIV)28 They did what your power and will had decided beforehand should happen. Also a very powerful one is
Colossians 2:8–10 (NIV)8 See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather than on Christ. 9 For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, 10 and you have been given...


These days I have friends all throwing their cribs at me, (maybe reason I am so tempted to start room), and I think its kind of funny....because I don't have a baby girl yet, but it sure is nice to know, that when that time comes, I will have a lot of help & support.

Okay; I have blabbed enough..guess I am trying to hide the fact that my I 171 has not arrived yet, let alone the Biometrics appointment...gee I sound like a broken record!